Archive for the ‘Movies’ Category

The Dark Knight Rises

Since the release of  The Dark Knight Rises, I’ve been gobbling up a lot of criticism and commentary on the movie. A lot of it is political interpretations, of course, being that I tend to read political people. Some of it is quite smart and interesting, more of it is quite silly.  But most important had been one thread of criticism I’ve seen that I agree with whole-heartedly.

That is, that even at nearly three hours long, the movie still feels short. This is a grand world, with grand happenings and we’re forced to walk through only a few select sections of it. A lot could be gained for this movie by us seeing more of this world. What was life in Gotham like when it was under siege? How much of Bane’s army was normal citizens pushed to the brink by their circumstances? What was life like for your average Gothamite throughout this movie? What are their thoughts and feelings of the events?  (more…)

Michael Bay Transformers

Douchenozzle Defined

Michael Bay is America’s raging boner, so it’s fitting that the third Transformers movie was released during the Fourth of July weekend. He’s an unstoppable force of pure id that’s far more concerned with getting his actresses to contort their spines to Jessica Rabbit proportions than with getting them to … you know … act. It doesn’t come off as nearly as attractive as just really uncomfortable.

Although, it’s somewhat comforting to know that even in the realm of “hotness” the Victoria Secret obsessed 12-year-old boys sitting on each other’s shoulders in an overcoat to pass themselves off as a director miss the point. Given that missing the point is kind of the strongest quality of his films. (more…)

Dammit, Pixar! Stop trying to melt my cold cold heart with your warmth and cuteness!

Toy Story 3 just started being streamed on Netflix Instant so I finally watched it (yea, I know, I’m late to the party, deal with it) and this was the third Pixar movie in a row to elicit a watery substance from my eyes that I’m told is called tears.

I was warned ahead of time that this might happen, but I didn’t listen. I swore it could never happen to me. After all, I had seen the two previous installments and no tears and I was a child then. (more…)

This weekend …. dun dun dun …. in a world … dun dun dun … where shlocky movies are made to pander to genders … dun dun dun … THERE WILL BE WAR! *cue hard rock sountrack*

So this is going to be perhaps the most interesting movie weekend we’ve seen a while or will see for sometime. Not only are there two movies I will personally definitely see, but there is a bigger clash going on as subtext to the whole weekend. A battle of the sexes. Ba-Da! (more…)

3D Is A Scourge On The Cinema

Posted: 07/23/2010 in Movies
Tags: , , , , ,

This whole 3D fad has got to stop. It is pure evil and must be defeated. I know Hollywood will never run out of cynical tricks to separate us from ever more of our money, but this one is the worst.

First of all, I thought we’d already defeated 3D. We’ve been through this fad before. Why won’t the 80s just die? Didn’t we learn anything from Jaws 3-D or Friday the Thirteenth 3-D? This wasn’t a good idea then and it’s not a good idea now. Why are we going through all of this all over again?

Secondly, it makes the whole movie experience worse. Yes, it’s amazing how that thing just popped out of the screen, but I could barely make it out because the colors have been so dulled. Also, it manages to make things that are cgi look even more obviously cgi. Congratulations, 3D, you’ve made the special effects look faker and I can’t even see them. (more…)