Why Elmo is Better Than God

Posted: 05/04/2012 in God Stuff
Tags: , ,

Yea, that’s right. Mmmm … let the blasphemy flow over you. Doesn’t that feel good? But I’m not writing this purely to piss off believers. In fact, I hope many of them will nod their heads along with what I write and ultimately see past the dressing and agree with my point. Anyway, here’s why Elmo is better than God.

Ok, disclaimer: I, personally, wasn’t the biggest Elmo fan as a child. I was much more of a Grover man and it seemed an awful lot like Elmo bit his style. I kind of resented him a little bit. That’s why it was kind of a relief to me to see that Kevin Clash, the voice of Elmo himself, to admit Grover was his favorite growing up as well in the documentary Being Elmo.

It was that documentary that inspired this post. It was there that Clash mentions his inspiration in creating Elmo. He recalls Frank Oz telling him about how he created characters, how he’d find a trait or two that would define the character and that would be their hook. Clash went on to explain that his hook for Elmo was love. Elmo is love.

Elmo is love. This reminded me of another common phrase you hear a lot from the liberal wing of extreme Christianity, hippies, or treacly vaguely Christian movies and TV shows: God is Love. It’s a nice sentiment and an attractive one; one that might attract compassionate people to becoming more religious or, more likely, more “spiritual.”

Except the truth is that God isn’t love, at least not the Judeo-Christian one, at least not in our society. Elmo is, though. You see, Elmo doesn’t just love, he loves you and he always loves you. He loves you no matter your size, shape, race, gender, or anything else. Elmo loves you whether you’re gay, straight, bi, transgender, or any type of queer. Elmo loves you whether you’re a Muslim, a Jew, a Christian, a Hindu, a Buddhist, an atheist, or any form of religion or lack thereof. Elmo still loves you if you’re an “impure” woman or a slave.

None of the artificial lines dividing humanity that seem to matter an awful lot to God, matter to Elmo.

Elmo loves indiscriminately and without reservation or condition. He’d never ask you to sacrifice an animal or your son to earn his love. You don’t need to prove yourself. Elmo doesn’t have rules, God does. Elmo just loves you.

God has no problem punishing the unfaithful and the sinners or taking vengeance. Elmo is uninterested in these things, he just loves you. You are fine the way you are. He asks for nothing more than a hug and a kiss.

Elmo is better than God.

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